A Letter to PTSD

Dear PTSD,
I never wanted for things to go this far, and now I feel I need to clear the air.  You have taken my husband and changed him in ways I never imagined.  You’ve stolen his patience, his mild manner, his ability to think rationally.   You’ve wedged yourself between us and turned us from a loving couple into roommates.  I want you to know, it’s not me, it’s you.
Before you go, here is what I want you to know: 
  • It is not my job to “micromanage” and make everyone do everything.  Some things will not make you happy, you will need to learn to deal with it. 
  • It is not my job to make sure everything in life goes the way you want it to.  I cannot control every aspect of your environment to help you avoid frustration. 
  • When things don’t go your way, you cannot take it out on me. 
  • I’m not willing to be yelled at, sworn at, or berated because you are in a bad mood or things didn’t go  your way.
  • I deserve to feel relaxed and happy.  I know you are on edge all the time, but I cannot sacrifice my own peace because you are struggling.  You will need to learn ways to cope.
  • I did not come with an “on/off” switch.”  Just because you feel bad for the way you acted, does not mean I can immediately turn off my emotions.  Likewise, following me repeating, “I’m sorry” and “I love you” will not help me calm down faster.  Sometimes I am allowed to be upset, especially after you’ve had an outburt.  I deserve a chance to cool down and regroup.
I am sorry it has to be this way, but the time has come to let you go and reclaim my husband.  I know this might be a difficult good-bye, but believe me when I say we will find a way to live without you.
A Frustrated Wife

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